There’s a Gift in Gray Chin Hairs

On October 5th, I turned 46.

A lot of people that I talk to in their forties and beyond don’t want to celebrate their birthdays. Me? Of course I want to celebrate!

In all honesty, I’ll celebrate anything. I’ll celebrate getting out the door on time on a Monday morning. I’ll celebrate the C that one of my kids worked their tails off to earn in their hardest class. I’ll most certainly celebrate any occasion with anyone and I’ll always find a good reason.

I think most people my age don’t want to celebrate getting older. It is funny how that shifts from when we were kids. We couldn’t wait to get older and hit the milestones….13, sweet 16, 18, 21! 

Do you remember what age you stopped counting? 

Maybe some of us stop counting around age 30. I can speak for myself when I say that milestone made me feel really nervous to approach. It’s the age when society tells us we are adults and we should be married, have kids, have a good paying job….and if we don’t add up, that age can be scary to reach. It is also a milestone where we feel we should “have it all together.” But let me ask you, at what point in our lives do we really have it all together? Those of you that are older than me, please tell me! Because I haven’t found that age yet.

Over lunch, talking about age, one of my friends told me that they stopped counting how old they were after 40. They stopped counting? Why? How? Does stopping the count take away the fact that we are aging? I think that it just puts us in denial.

I mean….let’s think about it for a second. The minute we are born we are getting older. Let that sink in. We’ve been going through life getting older this whole time! And so much has happened! I’ve made it this far….

I made it through infancy and into toddlerhood, learning how to walk and talk (not an easy feat!).

I made it through adolescence and puberty (thank goodness we can’t go backwards in age!!).

I made it through bad break ups.

I made it through heartache.

I made it through miscarriages.

I made it through grief.

Each year that has passed has left me with scars, wrinkles, and gray hairs. Proof that I am getting older, yes. But also proof that I am living. 

I’m living with my two amazing children that have so much to give this world.

I’m living through the eyes of my fun and loving niece.

I’m living with the love and support of my awesome (and handsome) husband.

I’m living through a career change and a start of something new.

I’m living through the change of seasons from bathing suits to sweater weather.

I’m living through all the ups and downs that life offers me on the daily.

Last year, two friends of mine were taken from this world way too soon. Later in the year, we went to celebrate the life of my husband’s grandmother who lived to be well over a hundred! These things were a reminder of how quickly things can change and how truly amazing it is that I am chosen to continue to walk this Earth. I feel like I have so much left to see and do in this world. I have so much more to make it through….to live through. How lucky am I??

I spent some time this morning Googling quotes about aging. I invite you to read and take a pause on this one for a second…

“If you’re not getting older, you’re dead.”

-Tom Petty

Oooof….that’s a direct and to-the-point message! But what I think he’s trying to say is:

Getting older is a privilege of living.

Getting older is something not everyone gets to do.

Celebrating a birthday is about celebrating something we’ve been doing since we were born…aging…making it through…living.

I found another quote in my Google Search this morning. I just couldn’t help myself. There’s a lot of good wisdom out there about getting older. This one is by one of my favorite authors from my childhood. She says….

“The great thing about getting older is that you don’t lose all the ages you’ve been.”

-Madeleine L’Engle

At one point, I used to relish in hitting the “benchmark” ages. 

I loved being 13! That’s when I had my first kiss. 

And 18? That’s when I met my husband! 

At age 21? Sorry Mom and Dad….that wasn’t the age of my first drink but it sure was a fun birthday celebration!

I had my first “real” teaching job by age 22.

I was married at age 27. 

I had my son at 31 and my daughter at 35.

Today, at age 46, I’m not losing any of that! All those ages that I’ve been have brought me to where I am now.  And there isn’t anywhere else I’d rather be.

A few weeks ago, I went to get my eyebrows waxed and shaped. It is something I do regularly so no judgement please! If you knew me when I was in my younger years, you would have seen the caterpillars that passed as eyebrows on my face. Although a good friend of mine pointed out the resemblance between my eyebrows and those on Brooke Shields back in her younger years, so I am going to run with that….

Anyway, I digress! While I was there, the woman giving me the wax pointed out a few hairs on my chin. She asked if she could remove those, too. Wait….what? Chin hairs? Gray chin hairs? 

“Please,” I told her. “Get rid of those quickly.”

I’m not a fan of the signs I have of aging. I know the gray chin hairs are just the beginning of what’s to come. I honestly don’t even want to think about it. Instead, I am going to choose to think about what I can do to keep myself young. Just because I am getting older doesn’t mean I have to get old.

Did you know we all have a fountain of youth inside of us? On my search for quotes, I came across another great one by Sophia Loren. She said, 

“There is a fountain of youth: it is your mind, your talents, the creativity you bring to your life and the lives of people you love. When you learn to tap this source, you will truly have defeated age.”

Thank you for that one, Sophia. I needed that today. I needed to be reminded that there is so much more to me than the number 46 and my gray chin hairs. 

I am writing this today to remind myself, on my 46th birthday and beyond, that I am living. I have so much to offer this world and so many great things in my future to receive. There are people that love me, and I love in return. And I am tapping into all of it, no matter how much heartbreak I feel. No matter my struggles or my grief. No matter if I have gray chin hairs.

Next time you feel that achy back, find that stray hair where it doesn’t belong, or notice something unpleasant about your age, remember this.

You are more than your age.

You are more than the number of years you have walked this Earth.

Your age has brought you to where you are now.

And it is a good place to be.

What’s my plan for the next 46 years? I’m going to take Sophia’s advice and tap into the sources of creativity and love that I have around me. I’m going to take it and go be amazing! 

Who’s with me??