In the Spirit of Thanksgiving….

There was a brief period of time when my family packed up a few things, put those things on a container ship, boarded a plane, and went to live in New Zealand. This was probably one of the best experiences we’ve ever had as a family. We lived there through Covid, where the country was pretty much living freely, and the rest of the world lived behind masks and plexiglass shields. My kids freely went to school, we rented a house, and my husband worked as a designer and engineer for a sailing team. 

While we were there, I absolutely fell in love with the country of New Zealand. I honestly can’t say enough good things about it. One thing that struck me from the moment I stepped on their soil was the different terms in the language that they use. I particularly enjoyed the term “partner.”

Back at home, not many people referred to their significant other as their partner. To me, that term was confusing….I couldn’t tell if the couple was married, gay, or simply dating. But it seemed that everyone around me in New Zealand referred to their better half as their “partner.” At first, this was uncomfortable for me. I didn’t connect with this term. I had never really used it!

But now that I am back in the USA, I have to be honest….I miss being referred to as Andrew’s partner. And I miss calling him my partner. Why? Because I have really learned to appreciate the meaning behind this term.

There is a famous quote by author and relationship coach, Barbara DeAngelis that says,

“Marriage is not a noun; it's a verb. It isn’t something you get. It’s something you do.”

Let me explain….fast forward a few years from our New Zealand experience and I find myself in an entirely new place. I have since left my job of over 20 years and started my own business. We came home from New Zealand and I worked for one more year as a public school classroom teacher. Throughout that year, I floated the idea to Andrew of leaving my position….just up and quitting! That meant a HUGE paycut. But Andrew could tell I was ready for a change. He was incredibly supportive. He helped me rewrite my resume, market myself on LinkedIn, and brainstorm ideas for my business. And at the end of the school year, he agreed to taking this giant leap to allow me to go on this crazy adventure.

After I made this change, I continued to get support from Andrew. He helped me rearrange our upstairs exercise room into a mini classroom and office. He began to take on more bill paying responsibilities since he was the primary money maker in the family. He continued to listen to and support my ideas for my new business. And, he reads and talks to me about these silly blogs, so I know he reads them!

The level of support and guidance I have gotten from Andrew in the last year or so is amazing. But that is not all that Andrew is to me….he is truly my partner. Together, we have remodeled a house with our own two pairs of hands, changed diapers, and stayed up at all hours of the night to feed and take care of our babies…….just to mention a few things! Now that our kids are getting older and more independent, he still shares the responsibilities. When I cook dinner, he cleans and puts away dishes. We say goodnight to our kids together. We split the driving between activities. We both created and continue to craft this family, in true partner fashion.

I think that a partnership is the perfect way to describe my relationship with Andrew. We are a team and we are in this together. Which is why, as I ponder it, I can’t imagine calling Andrew anything else. The word “husband” doesn’t quite have the same meaning behind it as “partner.” There is so much more substance behind Andrew and I than husband and wife. 

I work hard to maintain a daily gratitude practice, where I share all that I am thankful for. This is beneficial to my health, both physically and mentally. So in the spirit of Thanksgiving, the art of appreciation, and the hopes that I inspire my readers, I am writing all of this today to express my gratitude for my partner, Andrew. 

I would not be sitting here right now, typing this blog and creating this business if it weren’t for him.

I wouldn’t be the mom that I am to our two gorgeous kids if it weren’t for him.

I wouldn’t have this amazing place to live if it weren’t for him.

We wouldn’t go on our favorite sailing vacations if it weren’t for him.

I wouldn’t have the love and joy in my life if it weren't for him.

I wouldn’t cook an awesome Thanksgiving meal without him.

I wouldn’t have someone that makes me laugh like he does.

……and I wouldn’t trade in my partner for anything in the world! I can’t wait to see what the future has in store for us because together it feels like we can do anything. I want to thank my New Zealand experience for giving me the language to express what we are together. Andrew truly is my greatest partner….the one that knows me best, my biggest cheerleader, the one that makes me smile the largest, my greatest source of comfort, and my favorite….And for that I am grateful!